1 Timothy 5
8 But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
It’s been three years since I first realized that mom was going to need help. I put plans aside. I sold my house. We have been through a lot together. My commitment still remains, as does my joy in glorifying God and giving back to my mom for what she has given to me.
It’s been a bit of a rough time these last few weeks as I have decided what this means in light of my upcoming marriage. I’ve gotten a lot of advice. Some of it good. Some of it ridiculous. But as always the wisdom of God leads me. I love this verse because it reminds me, when the world would pull me away from what God has planned, that I am a child of the King, and that I share in His joy and His sufferings.
At the same time, I want to give a 100% commitment to my marriage and to my relationship with Alek, and I don’t want the things we are going to do to interfere or hinder my mom’s life in any way. These go all the way down from very big picture things to very small, practical ones.
So what does providing look like? Right now, it looks like an apartment for my mom, close to the granddaughters, close to her old home in Roebuck, close to her doctors, and hopefully closer to a freer, more independent style of life. For all her health problems she isn’t doing too badly, and I’d like to see that happen.
For me? There will be sacrifices. It isn’t the least expensive option available. There’s duplication of expenses. I’ll be budgeting for her as well as us. Means less house, less stuff, which sounds like a great plan.
Can we help the nations as much? I don’t know. But according to Paul (and Jesus) if I give all my money to the gospel in the nations, and can’t find the resources to help those who are closest to me, I have no faith to speak of. So the choice becomes clear, that my Radical Experiment begins at home
For my mom.. change is tough. I don’t think it’s her first choice, even if it is a better choice. Part of love for me is that I don’t want to directly dictate or indirectly dictate how she lives her life. This is a great time for her. Granddaughters are coming from everywhere, she has been in relatively good health for a long period. The darkest clouds from 2006 and 2007 have passed for now, and there is nothing standing in the way from her greatly enjoying the next few years of her life, with her family by her side.
Pray for her, and pray for me. Because change is difficult, and because of some other outside factors, I am feeling some guilt about not bringing her with us when we get married. I don’t think it’s the right feeling or the healthy feeling, but it’s there. I don’t know what else to say to that, except that I take joy in taking care of others, and I take joy in my Lord. I am trying hard to make the right decision, but I will settle for a wise decision. It’s not always fun and not always easy, and following Christ is hardly ever the easier way to go. But it’s the right way.
More to come for sure! God Bless!
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